GENERATION FU

GENERATION FU

Remember Christian Slater?  Most of you kids haven’t even heard of him.  Did you know Charlie Sheen was a huge Hollywood film star before Two & A Half Men? What about Rob Lowe? Molly Ringwald? Michael J Fox? 

If you were a teen in the 90’s, then these were the film stars you wanted to be like.  These were our heroes along with the rock stars and rappers who influenced our lives.  Pop culture was just that; a culture. A way of life.  An identity. Ripped jeans, wallet chains, hair gel and an anti-establishment attitude.  This is what we were taught to aspire to by the pop icons we looked up to. 

Jay-z, Linkin Park and Kurt Cobain told us to fuck authority, and Green Day told us to be the minority. Christian Slater told us it was ok to be a burnout skater and Judd Nelson said we should quit burying our noses in school books and go out there and grab life by the balls.

We were the celebrated underdogs; the Rocky’s, the Karate Kids, The Breakfast Club. They sold us the dream.  A dream that we could be whatever we wanted to be.  An entire generation with the dreamer’s disease.

So what happened to that generation?  I’ll tell you what happened.  They’re all in their late 20’s – late 30’s now, stuck doing jobs that they hate and are bitter and angry but too afraid to complain.

Well I’m here to tell you that it’s ok to complain.  We’re not generation X or Y or whatever other box the marketing text books have put us in.  We’re Generation FU...because we were pretty much fucked from the get-go.  Society had a look at us, put one of those fingers on each hand up and said FU!  Is it any wonder that all our 90’s heroes were so angry?  Doesn’t matter if they were actors, rappers, punk rockers, grunge rockers or whatever those emo’s were going for, they were pissed off and rightfully so. 

We were told by our teachers that computers were going to be huge and we’d need a basic knowledge of it if we were to really do anything with our lives.  What they didn’t tell us was how quickly this was going to happen.  By the time we graduated, we were applying for jobs that never even existed when we were choosing our subjects in high school, competing against pimply faced brats who were running their own online stores and mentioning “digital” as one of their skills.  We were ill prepared.  Worst of all is that we’re still dreamers.  Bitter, disillusioned dreamers who, if we were to be able to find a flux capacitor and power the Delorean, we’d be too embarrassed to go back to our teenage selves and tell them what they have to look forward to in their 30’s.  Sorry buddy, you’re not a pilot, or a rockstar, or a rapper, or a film star, or a game designer or comic book artist or author.  Shit, you’re not even one of the orphaned kids from Party Of Five.  You’re just working for the man.

We had heroes who told us to “Stick It To The Man”, not heroes like Steve Jobs and Mark Zuckerberg who told us to “move faster than the man, go up against him and then become the man”.

I know, I know.  Excuses, excuses.  Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that we had no choice.  I’m just saying that the only theory I could come up with for the disappointment I see every day is this; that we were sold the idea of being a dreamer but never prepared for what will happen while we had our eyes on those dreams.  We’re proud to be dreamers.  We’re proud to be the ones who can remember every word of the Gummi Bears theme song.  We just feel a little jilted that we were caught off guard by a wave of change so huge and fast, the likes of which have not been seen since the industrial revolution.

Now I’m not blaming Christian Slater, John Hughes or Dawson & Joey.  I’m not blaming Eminem, Snoop, Green Day, Nirvana or Rage Against The Machine. 

Those 90’s heroes of ours, from Superman to Robert Downey Jr, the ones who were responsible for us becoming dreamers, the ones who were huge back then but seemed to fade into the background later; they’ve taught us an important lesson – “It’s never too late to make a comeback.”

And that’s what we’re going to do, we’re going to make a comeback...and we’re coming back stronger than ever.

 ...oh and this is where we wanted to work

 

That is all...

Top 5 Movie Soundtrack Albums

Ramzee says:

Let’s start this off with a quote from a little somebody named, William Shakespeare. “If music be the food of love, play on, give me excess of it.”

You might not agree with anything me or The Jillybean ever have to say, but you have to agree that old Bill Shakespeare knew his stuff.  Music is by far the most powerful way of stirring emotion. Way before Charlie Chaplin even dreamed of uttering a word onscreen, the film soundtrack was already capturing the hearts of millions.  Whether it’s the music in Chariots Of Fire that gets you pumping or witnessing Josie Grossie’s first kiss to the backtrack of a Beach Boys song, a film scene is burned into your memory and holds a special place in your heart because of that song that was chosen so perfectly for that specific scene.  Every romantic wishes that they could experience just one movie moment with that perfect song playing in the background.  Every athlete wishes that they could lift the trophy with the perfect song playing in the background. Every road trip is started with at least one person finding the perfect songs for playing in the background.  Why? Because without realising it, our favourite films have somehow chosen the playlist for us to have as the soundtrack to our lives.  Here are my Top 5 Movie Soundtrack Albums.

5. American Pie

Many of these 90’s, high school, coming of age, teeny bopper films had amazing soundtracks.  They chose the most popular pop rock songs of the year and plastered them wherever they could.  What makes American Pie stand out?  It didn’t use the song to define a mediocre movie moment like She’s All That did when Rachel Leigh Cook came walking down the stairs to the song, Kiss Me.  They used the songs to compliment each scene.  One of the best scenes is when Oz and Heather are having their first real conversation and Good Morning Baby is playing.  Best songs on the album are Sway by Bic Runga and Mutt by Blink 182.

4. The Lion King

Because it doesn’t matter how many Hanna Montana’s, Raven’s or Hillary Duff clones Disney shits out, Timon and Pumba will always be our favourite Disney singers.  From kids who watched the first screening to kids who are watching their parents’ old copies of The Lion King, all of us can sing along to every song in this movie.  Best songs on the album are Be Prepared and Hakuna Matata.

3. A Bronx tale

I’m a huge fan of Motown.  While everyone else is bopping their heads to Dubstep, that’s blaring so loudly in their headphones that the person down the street can hear it, I’m singing along and tapping my foot to old Motown songs.  Hugh Grant said it perfectly in Music & Lyrics, "You can take all the novels in the world, and not one of them will make you feel as good as fast as "I've got sunshine on a cloudy day. When it's cold outside, I've got the month of May"

This album has some of the best Motown songs along with some rock n roll and a bit of Dean Martin thrown in just for flavour.  Best songs are Tell It Like It Is by Aaron Neville and Streets Of The Bronx by Cool Change.

2. Pulp Fiction

Once again, the use of Motown was essential in this album to give some of the scenes the incredible atmosphere that this movie has.  Rock n Roll and Motown is not even the best part of the soundtrack album.  Best part is that snippets of dialogue from the film are included on the album. Best songs?  Let’s Stay Together by Al Green, Son Of A Preacher Man by Dusty Springfield, Girl You’ll Be A Woman Soon by Urge Overkill (And yes, Neil Diamond fans, I know it’s actually his song) and You Never Can Tell by Chuck Berry, 

1. Almost Famous

Nobody compiles a soundtrack album like Cameron Crowe.  Nobody.  As good as his films are, they would never be as good if he didn’t include the amazing music that has now become his signature.  It’s like his films are feature length music videos.  A Cameron Crowe film without great music would look weirder than Voldemort does without his nose.  This soundtrack has everything from Simon & Garfunkel to Led Zeppelin.  Best songs? Simple Man by Lynyrd Skynyrd and Tiny Dancer by Elton John.  Oh you don’t believe that an Elton John song could be one of the best songs on the album when Led Zeppelin, David Bowie, Cat Stevens and The Who are all listed on this album? If you’ve seen this movie, then think back to the sing-a-long scene in the bus.  Yep, I knew you’d agree with me.  For those who have no idea what I’m talking about; here you go...

The Jillybean says:

I’ve been told to have quite an eclectic taste for music. Another little something that Ramzee and I simply love. A good ‘ol beat.

Now, my top 5 movie soundtracks just blows my mind. In fact, all I need to do is close my eyes, turn up the volume and I’d still enjoy it. Lies, lies, lies. My list not only offers you an array of great tunes from different eras but are classic movies that should be part of your dusty old movie collection already.

If you’re looking for movies to entertain you on those lonely nights when your bb light is not flashing and even your mom and dad has plans to go out, then here you go. And yes, it’s my pleasure.

5. Project X 

Walked into the cinema high on...life, and decided to catch this “party of the century” movie that had everyone talking. Of course my anticipation was on the top shelf and by the time I had placed my upsized coke in its holder and my coughing pop corn between my legs, I was over it. The picture at first was over whelming and gave me a damn headache. Not the kind of movie to be high on...life. Walked out and caught Contraband. Awesome. But we’ll leave it there.

A few weeks later I decided to give it another bash. My sexy Italian stallion flew into town for one night only. Chilling out in one of Cape Town’s beautiful hotels we got high on...life, curled up and got right into Project X. The beats were raunchy, dirty and the bass was blowing. It wasn’t long before we were in the mood to party and party hard. Needless to say, our rump shakers were up and we hit the town.

4. City of Angels

Loved the movie but “In the arms on an angel” was over played by my mum and it did my head in whenever I heard it. Along came Ramzee and guess who had the soundtrack on CD. An ORIGINAL copy. Got to love that guy. Driving home from work one day I slipped it into my cd player and I found myself enjoying 17:30 Cape Town traffic. A mix of soul and blues, it soothed my wild spirit. Pick of the soundtrack “Mamma you got a daughter”. If you want to connect with some soul and blues. Go and pick up this cd. It’s worth it.

3. Roll bounce

So here’s an era that many people are still living in. And so am I. The 70’s was all about love, cool outfits, funk and being high on...life.

The movie wasn’t the best. More like, easy TV. It was made to right the wrongs of the roller-disco-obsessed movies that were actually made while the craze was operating at full blast. The old school material was well chosen. Let me educate you. Bill Withers’ “Lovely day”, Foxy’s “Get off”, Vaughn Mason & Crew’s “Bounce, rock, skate, roll”, Chics “Le Freak”. Some of the newbies in the industry provides covers that couldn’t possibly match the originals but for some freaky funky juice, do yourselves and favour and listen to “a taste of honey” by Brooke Valentine. Yummy.

Be transported to the era of love...you can thank me later.

2. Dirty dancing

Is this one a little obvious? I hope not. I’m still waiting for my Ryan Gos...I meant Patrick Swayze to lift me up and make me feel like a feather. My dreams live on.

“Be my baby”, “Hungry eyes”, “Don’t you feel like crying”..actually, I might just pop that one into the DVD player tonight. This soundtrack gets me excited every time. Except that hoola hoola crap song sung by Baby’s older sister. My bleeding ears.

Definitely a few of these to be played at my wedding one day. Hopefully I can get out of always being the bridesmaid. Never the damn bride.

1. Rock of Ages

Ramzee, I sure hope you watched this by now and if not, “you have some splainin to do” (if you know where this line originally comes from, you have excellent taste in movies)

I have never in my life jumped off my chair and sang at the top of my alto voice like I did when I was watching this movie. Tom Cruise is brilliant (not that I’m big on this guy) but his performance was simply top class and I was sure I was on my way to being a rockstar after seeing this musical. That man made me believe! Don’t be alarmed. An 80’s over spill of freakin awesome mash ups performed by Tom Cruise, Julianne Hough, Katherine Zita Jones, Diego Boneta, Malin Akerman, Mary J Blige, Russel Brand and much more. Entertaining from beginning to end. Just go and see it already. You are going to love it you 80’s freaks!

That is all.

Top 5 Movie Villains

Ramzee says:

Love them or hate them, every movie needs a good villain. Whether they’re comical, charismatic, psychotic or just pure evil; they’re the ones we love to hate.  Sure, everyone hopes that the square-jawed Johnny Bravo looking hero gets to save the day at the end but where would he be without a villain?  Every protagonist needs an antagonist.  The man in black vs the cowboy with the white hat.  The battle between good and evil.

Sometimes we want the villain to live long enough just so that we can hear them deliver another cool line with only the swagger that a villain possesses…and sometimes we hope they get drowned in a pool of hobo urine.  Whatever it is, they deserve as much credit as any hero because they offer what Agent Smith so eloquently told Neo, “Purpose”. They are essential and deserve to be celebrated for being deliciously creepy and sinister.

5. Kathryn Merteuil – Cruel Intentions

And you thought Buffy The Vampire Slayer couldn’t be more boneable? Kathryn is unlike any other female villain you’ve seen before (except maybe for Nurse Ratchet from Cuckoo’s Nest but Kathryn is hotter).  She’s a strong female, methodical, evil, remorseless and a bitch in every way you imagined a girl out of your league would be.  She was feared by men and women alike and in her spare time corrupted innocent young virgins. How can you not love this girl? 

 4. Raoul Silva – Skyfall

Javier Bardem plays, what I think, is the best Bond villain yet.  He steals every scene he’s in.  Raoul Silva is intelligent, witty and flirtatious.  Seriously, even James Bond gets caught a little off guard when the latest Bond villain seductively strokes Bond’s chest instead of a white cat like previous villains were known to do.  His presence is not so much menacing as it is confusing.  He is a 6 foot hulking Javier Bardem with bleached blonde hair, a white suit and a tendency to make playful homo-erotic innuendos when threatening James Bond.  I suppose it’s about time that horny old James got a taste of his own sexually harassing medicine.

3. Dr. Evil – Austin Powers

Yes, Dr.Evil. How can you not love Dr.Evil? He built a freakin’ “Laser” to destroy the world!  He didn’t rob a bank. He didn’t attempt to assassinate the president. He didn’t kidnap Liam Neeson’s daughter. No, Dr.Evil threatened to blow up the world if he didn’t get “One Million Dollars”. The world!  He is Evil.  He’s so evil that his name is Evil. He’s so evil that he has a mini clone that is evil.  He doesn’t stroke furry cats like old Bond villains, his cat doesn’t even have hair.  Mr.Bigglesworth is a hairless cat.  Only the most evil of evil villains own hairless cats.  But beside all of that he is the most loveable villain of all time.  A father who just wants a relationship with his son, Scotty, and to prove to Scotty that he truly can be the most evil villain there ever was.

2. Dr. Hannibal Lector – The Silence Of The Lambs

“Do you still hear the lambs Clarice?”

Hannibal Lecter was the villain who was the inspiration for future films to create more intelligent villains.  Played to perfection by Anthony Hopkins, he sent chills down your spine with every word that crossed his lips.  Most of the fear he placed in you, was from inside a prison cell…and then he escaped.  The scariest thing they could do was make you believe that the most evil, sadistic, cannibal, criminal mastermind was behind bars and then show you how he escapes to be free to roam your neighbourhood.  And this after the creepiest line in the film was burned into your memory,

 “I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice chianti. Sslslslslslsssss”

1.    Kaizer Soze – The Usual Suspects

Kaizer Soze is the ultimate villain because he doesn’t really exist.  He’s a mythical figure that is characterized only through criminal folklore, hearsay and exaggerated rumours.  A spook story.  The boogey man.

Kaizer Soze is the devil.  He makes you believe only what he wants you to believe.  You do only what he wants you to do and even criminals who got shot more times than 50Cent fear this man. Probably the most famous line in the film that describes the power of Kaizer Soze is when Verbal Kint says, “The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world that he didn’t exist”.

This villain makes you want to be a villain.  You know it’s wrong but you can’t help but want to be him.  To have that power.  He doesn’t need the physical presence to strike fear into another human being.  He can go toe to toe with men badder than Mr.T and mind fuck them better than Christoph Waltz’ Jew Hunter character ever could.

 “Keaton always said, ‘I don’t believe in God but I’m afraid of him’.  Well, I believe in God and the only thing that scares me is, Kaizer Soze.”

The Jillybean says:

I honestly think there's a little villain in everyone. How can you not secretly aspire to be that badass? These guys do what they want and don't let anyone tell them otherwise. Sometimes they scare the crap out of us, sometimes we simply loathe them, and other times we’re secretly cheering them on against the far more boring hero. There are way too many great villains to mention, but here are my personal top five:

5. The Joker – The Dark Knight

The Heath Ledger Joker was an entirely new creation that fascinated and terrified pretty much everyone. Even to the end you wondered if he could possibly be reasoned with, but he was a rabid dog: no grand master plan, no greater scheme for enrichment or religious ideals or even revenge. You couldn’t relate to him in any way, and his thoroughly creepy mannerisms sent shivers down my spine.

All due respect to Jack Nicholson, he was a little hard to take seriously. Alfred summed it up nicely: “Some men just want to watch the world burn.”

4. Malificent – Sleeping Beauty

Malificent was probably the first movie villain that ever truly terrified me. She had minions, she had an evil laugh, she had horns and crazy witch-powers and could turn into a dragon. Pretty scary as a five-year-old who thought the movie was going to be about taking naps and kissing princes.

But as I’ve gotten older Malificent has started to scare me in totally new ways. When you think about it, she’s really a bit of a social outcast. A bit older, maybe not conventionally pretty, single woman with a lot of pets. She obviously feels a bit isolated, and then the king and queen purposefully snub her at the social event of the season.

So she just kinda snaps. And okay, maybe taking it out on a baby was a bit much, but I just sort of empathise with her a bit, y’know? Okay now I’m just starting to scare myself. This is why you don’t drink and watch Disney, people.

3. Darth Vader – Star Wars Episodes IV-VI

How do I fear thee Vader? Let me count the ways... Imposing physical presence complete with black mask to hide any trace of emotion? Check. Deep, alpha-male voice? Check. Complete mastery of mystical powers capable of killing a man without even touching him? Check. Planet-sized death machine? Check. Secret emotional layers discovered at the 11^th hour when he couldn’t stand to see his only son being tortured? Ummm, let me get a tissue…

Millions of light sabre-wielding geeks can’t be wrong; even the combined efforts of Hayden Christianson and George Lucas himself couldn’t kill Vader’s cool in the prequels that must not be named. All hail the king of badassery!

2. The Shark - Jaws

He was the ultimate evil: remorseless, mysterious, and an apex predator evolved over 300 million years with the sole purpose of killing whatever happened to be floating nearby.

Just try to tell me you’ve never, and I mean never, worried about sharks when you got into the ocean. Rubbery and mechanical he may be, Jaws made an entire generation scared to go in the water, and may or may not be the reason I still don’t know how to swim. We know it’s just a movie, we tell ourselves sharks don’t actively attempt to crash boats, but that shiver down your spine when something brushes your leg in the water? That’s still Jaws.

1.    The Phantom - The Phantom of the Opera

Now hear me out before you get all judgy. This guy’s certifiably wacko, granted. But it’s that same kind of wacko displayed by serial killers who get married while in prison. The same way Ted Bundy charmed dozens of women, and I’m assuming this is how Idi Amin and Saddam Hussein got laid. It’s that sexy wacko that gets the ladies all crazylike.

Here we have Gerard Butler at a near-300 level of fitness. And he can sing. And he can work that cape like nobody’s business. I’m sorry, but a rich pretty boy with flouncy blouses and bouncy hair doesn’t stand a chance. This is why the Phantom is so dangerous: even though you know in your heart he’s a murdering schizophrenic psychopath with a blow-up doll in a wedding dress that looks eerily like you… you just can’t help yourself.

And that is all.

(*guest Jillybean - Anya Klaasen. Follow her on twitter @AnyaFK)