Top 5 Movie Villains

Ramzee says:

Love them or hate them, every movie needs a good villain. Whether they’re comical, charismatic, psychotic or just pure evil; they’re the ones we love to hate.  Sure, everyone hopes that the square-jawed Johnny Bravo looking hero gets to save the day at the end but where would he be without a villain?  Every protagonist needs an antagonist.  The man in black vs the cowboy with the white hat.  The battle between good and evil.

Sometimes we want the villain to live long enough just so that we can hear them deliver another cool line with only the swagger that a villain possesses…and sometimes we hope they get drowned in a pool of hobo urine.  Whatever it is, they deserve as much credit as any hero because they offer what Agent Smith so eloquently told Neo, “Purpose”. They are essential and deserve to be celebrated for being deliciously creepy and sinister.

5. Kathryn Merteuil – Cruel Intentions

And you thought Buffy The Vampire Slayer couldn’t be more boneable? Kathryn is unlike any other female villain you’ve seen before (except maybe for Nurse Ratchet from Cuckoo’s Nest but Kathryn is hotter).  She’s a strong female, methodical, evil, remorseless and a bitch in every way you imagined a girl out of your league would be.  She was feared by men and women alike and in her spare time corrupted innocent young virgins. How can you not love this girl? 

 4. Raoul Silva – Skyfall

Javier Bardem plays, what I think, is the best Bond villain yet.  He steals every scene he’s in.  Raoul Silva is intelligent, witty and flirtatious.  Seriously, even James Bond gets caught a little off guard when the latest Bond villain seductively strokes Bond’s chest instead of a white cat like previous villains were known to do.  His presence is not so much menacing as it is confusing.  He is a 6 foot hulking Javier Bardem with bleached blonde hair, a white suit and a tendency to make playful homo-erotic innuendos when threatening James Bond.  I suppose it’s about time that horny old James got a taste of his own sexually harassing medicine.

3. Dr. Evil – Austin Powers

Yes, Dr.Evil. How can you not love Dr.Evil? He built a freakin’ “Laser” to destroy the world!  He didn’t rob a bank. He didn’t attempt to assassinate the president. He didn’t kidnap Liam Neeson’s daughter. No, Dr.Evil threatened to blow up the world if he didn’t get “One Million Dollars”. The world!  He is Evil.  He’s so evil that his name is Evil. He’s so evil that he has a mini clone that is evil.  He doesn’t stroke furry cats like old Bond villains, his cat doesn’t even have hair.  Mr.Bigglesworth is a hairless cat.  Only the most evil of evil villains own hairless cats.  But beside all of that he is the most loveable villain of all time.  A father who just wants a relationship with his son, Scotty, and to prove to Scotty that he truly can be the most evil villain there ever was.

2. Dr. Hannibal Lector – The Silence Of The Lambs

“Do you still hear the lambs Clarice?”

Hannibal Lecter was the villain who was the inspiration for future films to create more intelligent villains.  Played to perfection by Anthony Hopkins, he sent chills down your spine with every word that crossed his lips.  Most of the fear he placed in you, was from inside a prison cell…and then he escaped.  The scariest thing they could do was make you believe that the most evil, sadistic, cannibal, criminal mastermind was behind bars and then show you how he escapes to be free to roam your neighbourhood.  And this after the creepiest line in the film was burned into your memory,

 “I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice chianti. Sslslslslslsssss”

1.    Kaizer Soze – The Usual Suspects

Kaizer Soze is the ultimate villain because he doesn’t really exist.  He’s a mythical figure that is characterized only through criminal folklore, hearsay and exaggerated rumours.  A spook story.  The boogey man.

Kaizer Soze is the devil.  He makes you believe only what he wants you to believe.  You do only what he wants you to do and even criminals who got shot more times than 50Cent fear this man. Probably the most famous line in the film that describes the power of Kaizer Soze is when Verbal Kint says, “The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world that he didn’t exist”.

This villain makes you want to be a villain.  You know it’s wrong but you can’t help but want to be him.  To have that power.  He doesn’t need the physical presence to strike fear into another human being.  He can go toe to toe with men badder than Mr.T and mind fuck them better than Christoph Waltz’ Jew Hunter character ever could.

 “Keaton always said, ‘I don’t believe in God but I’m afraid of him’.  Well, I believe in God and the only thing that scares me is, Kaizer Soze.”

The Jillybean says:

I honestly think there's a little villain in everyone. How can you not secretly aspire to be that badass? These guys do what they want and don't let anyone tell them otherwise. Sometimes they scare the crap out of us, sometimes we simply loathe them, and other times we’re secretly cheering them on against the far more boring hero. There are way too many great villains to mention, but here are my personal top five:

5. The Joker – The Dark Knight

The Heath Ledger Joker was an entirely new creation that fascinated and terrified pretty much everyone. Even to the end you wondered if he could possibly be reasoned with, but he was a rabid dog: no grand master plan, no greater scheme for enrichment or religious ideals or even revenge. You couldn’t relate to him in any way, and his thoroughly creepy mannerisms sent shivers down my spine.

All due respect to Jack Nicholson, he was a little hard to take seriously. Alfred summed it up nicely: “Some men just want to watch the world burn.”

4. Malificent – Sleeping Beauty

Malificent was probably the first movie villain that ever truly terrified me. She had minions, she had an evil laugh, she had horns and crazy witch-powers and could turn into a dragon. Pretty scary as a five-year-old who thought the movie was going to be about taking naps and kissing princes.

But as I’ve gotten older Malificent has started to scare me in totally new ways. When you think about it, she’s really a bit of a social outcast. A bit older, maybe not conventionally pretty, single woman with a lot of pets. She obviously feels a bit isolated, and then the king and queen purposefully snub her at the social event of the season.

So she just kinda snaps. And okay, maybe taking it out on a baby was a bit much, but I just sort of empathise with her a bit, y’know? Okay now I’m just starting to scare myself. This is why you don’t drink and watch Disney, people.

3. Darth Vader – Star Wars Episodes IV-VI

How do I fear thee Vader? Let me count the ways... Imposing physical presence complete with black mask to hide any trace of emotion? Check. Deep, alpha-male voice? Check. Complete mastery of mystical powers capable of killing a man without even touching him? Check. Planet-sized death machine? Check. Secret emotional layers discovered at the 11^th hour when he couldn’t stand to see his only son being tortured? Ummm, let me get a tissue…

Millions of light sabre-wielding geeks can’t be wrong; even the combined efforts of Hayden Christianson and George Lucas himself couldn’t kill Vader’s cool in the prequels that must not be named. All hail the king of badassery!

2. The Shark - Jaws

He was the ultimate evil: remorseless, mysterious, and an apex predator evolved over 300 million years with the sole purpose of killing whatever happened to be floating nearby.

Just try to tell me you’ve never, and I mean never, worried about sharks when you got into the ocean. Rubbery and mechanical he may be, Jaws made an entire generation scared to go in the water, and may or may not be the reason I still don’t know how to swim. We know it’s just a movie, we tell ourselves sharks don’t actively attempt to crash boats, but that shiver down your spine when something brushes your leg in the water? That’s still Jaws.

1.    The Phantom - The Phantom of the Opera

Now hear me out before you get all judgy. This guy’s certifiably wacko, granted. But it’s that same kind of wacko displayed by serial killers who get married while in prison. The same way Ted Bundy charmed dozens of women, and I’m assuming this is how Idi Amin and Saddam Hussein got laid. It’s that sexy wacko that gets the ladies all crazylike.

Here we have Gerard Butler at a near-300 level of fitness. And he can sing. And he can work that cape like nobody’s business. I’m sorry, but a rich pretty boy with flouncy blouses and bouncy hair doesn’t stand a chance. This is why the Phantom is so dangerous: even though you know in your heart he’s a murdering schizophrenic psychopath with a blow-up doll in a wedding dress that looks eerily like you… you just can’t help yourself.

And that is all.

(*guest Jillybean - Anya Klaasen. Follow her on twitter @AnyaFK)