Ramzee says:
Somewhere deep inside us is that primal fetish to see people
beat the snot out of each other. This
probably stems from a childhood of longing to be the victor in a fight. Nothing says “competition” better than two
men beating the crap out of each other.
Mano a mano. Toe to toe.
Tyler Durden said it the best, “How much can you really know
about yourself if you’ve never been in a fight?”
When you’re a little boy, you dream of being able to take on
the school bully and propel his face through the back of his head with a
Jean-Claude Van Damme spinning heal kick.
You cheered to the symphony of breaking bones and snapping necks while
watching Steven Seagal take on the baddies.
Why did you watch those old karate movies even though their mouths
didn’t move in sync with the words? You
couldn’t care less about the dialogue.
You cared even less about the story.
So why did you sit and watch those movies over and over again with your
friends? The answer is simple. It’s because everybody was kung fu fighting
and their kicks were fast as lightning!
You were able to live out your wildest, most violent fantasies and be
the hero at the end of it all. Let’s
face it, we all have something worth fighting for but the Van Damme’s and
Seagal’s of the movies were the ones who actually threw the punches. So now, in honour of those who made us jump
from the top of our double bunk beds and rescue the girl next door, after
delivering a swift round-house kick to the Joe Pesci looking bad guy who
kidnapped her; here is my ultimate fight club of top 5 movie fight scenes.
5. Daniel Larusso
(Daniel-san) VS Johnny Lawrence – The Karate Kid
Why? Because no fight
scene has embedded itself more deeply into pop culture. Try to remember the excitement of when you
saw this for the first time. You were
Daniel-san. You were the underdog. The evil sensai of the Cobra Kai dojo tells
Johnny Lawrence to “Sweep the leg”. You’re
horrified! Even Johnny Lawrence couldn’t
believe what he was hearing but he does what his sensai tells him and executes
the sweep kick, injuring Daniel whose leg was already injured from a previous
round. It looked like Johnny was going to win the round and retain the
title. Then came the most iconic martial
arts move in the history of cinema. The
crane kick. Yes, the one we all
practiced as children. Daniel-san
delivers the coup de grace with the crane kick and wins the trophy. The real win?
Johnny Lawrence handing over the trophy saying, “You’re all right,
Larusso.”
4. Rocky Balboa VS
Apollo Creed – Rocky
If this list was longer, I would have Rocky I – IV on it. Honestly, all four movies have amazing fight
scenes but, for me, part one has to get the spot on this list. Watching Rocky go the distance, trading
punches with the champion and seeing him illustrate his motto “it’s not about
how hard you hit, it’s about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward”,
is enough to make your heart stop. You
scream and cheer for Rocky to get up and push through. You get pumped with adrenaline when Mickey
yells motivation at Rocky after each round.
Best of all is when you hold your breath as they count out the final
round and see that Rocky gave as good as he got. It didn’t even matter that he didn’t win that
match. The match-up was so intense that
you know it couldn’t have ended any better.
And as for the Italian Stallion; he didn’t care about winning
either. He just wanted to make it to the
final round and wanted Adrienne to be there with him when he did it.
3. Jackie Chan VS
anyone else in the movie – Drunken Master 2
See Jackie Chan at his best.
If you haven’t seen this movie then you MUST make an effort to find
it. Find a video store with a good
selection of old movies, visit that cousin who claims he can download all the
seasons of Lost in one day, petition for the “Classic Movies” channel to play
this one. Do what you need to. It’s worth it.
Before Jackie Chan became a comedian, before he used ladders
to slap comical bad guys across the face and way before Hollywood crapped Chris
Tucker all over this man’s true martial arts ability and insane fight
choreography, THERE WAS DRUNKEN MASTER.
Pick a fight scene, any fight scene and it will blow the
moustache off your creepy uncle’s face!
2. Jet Li VS Mel
Gibson and Danny Glover – Lethal Weapon 4
Jet Li’s first transition into American film. I know, a lot of people are throwing up their
hands right now and spouting “WTF” and a barrage of other consonants that’s
formed part of the attack on the English language. Relax, I am fully aware that Jet Li has
starred in some of the best martial arts movies that the Far East has been so
kind to offer us. But watch this movie
again and get back to me…
The final scene shows Riggs and Murtaugh circling the
diminutive Jet Li, ready to tear him a new one and several more if they
can. Murtaugh towers over Jet Li and
Riggs has that crazy look in his eyes.
Seems like an easy one. The fight
ensues with Jet Li ripping through the two old timers. He even dislocates Riggs’
shoulder…again. What makes this one of
my favourite fight scenes, is the fact that there are no invisible wires and
that not everyone involved in this fight knows karate. The two cops don’t dance around Li and fight
him one at a time. They run at him
together and proceed to try and give him an old fashioned beat down with their
fists. They manage to spear an iron rod
through his chest and then shoot and drown the little guy, but not before he
takes Mel Gibson with him. It would have
been easier to kill Jason Vorhees.
Murtaugh saves Riggs as usual.
1. Bruce Lee VS
Chuck Norris – Way of the Dragon
It’s a fight scene between Bruce Lee and Chuck Norris! You should be weeping at the very thought of
being able to see something like this.
One more reason to see this is simply to see Bruce Lee pull
out the indestructible Chuck Norris’ glorious chest hair. It can be done! Believe it.
*True story:
After filming, Chuck Norris offered Bruce Lee a
beverage. Chuck asked Bruce what he
would like to drink, to which Bruce replied, “Wataaa”.
My best kick ass moments…also the moves I secretly imagine
myself doing to Ramzee at times.
5. Karate Kid
The Crane Kick…how I wish I could put a boot in someone’s head
like that. Daniel San…you inspire me in my weakest moments.
4. The Rock
The movie is a bit
hazy for me, however, Nick…I didn’t mind if you had dropped that green little
ball we all ended up like cheesy Thriller Zombies. You made me love blue jeans.
3. House of Flying
Daggers
I think this must be one of the best spaghetti movies made.
I mean, a hot blind Asian chic jumping around with her tiny little body,
throwing around some daggers. I don’t mind rolling around in the meadows with
you. You can even smack me around a couple of times.
2. Rocky 1
CUT IT! CUT IT! OMG! Cut it already! Ya know!
1. Warrior
The latest kick ass movie I’ve seen. Hands down it was
simply brilliant. The thick of this tale was so emotional of how families try
to support each other and try to right their wrongs was intense. A story of two
brothers who ultimately beat the crap out of each other at the end. The final
fight was so intense I was on the couch asking Tommy to please stop! World
class fighting. A must see.
And that is all.
