WE ORDERED AN EXTRA LARGE
I wrote a post a while back about how creativity in the film
industry is, for the most part, gone. Remakes, sequels, reboots and poor
adaptations of novels that were, at best, average. Film fans lowering their
standards so they can get excited about the art they so dearly love, but in the
end celebrating the mediocrity Hollywood has forced us to swallow.
Thank God (or whatever name you shout out during your
orgasm) for the little gems that have kept us from drowning slowly in our tears
of disappointment and boredom. Too dramatic? Ok, this post is not about those
little gems (I’ll talk about that in another piece), this is about the loss of
creativity in the film industry and it can be seen in all aspects of it, even
in the PORN INDUSTRY. Yes, that little bit about the orgasm was foreshadowing.
For a minute, just forget about the purpose of porn and why
it makes money. Think about it from a creative standpoint. Porn stars used to
have creative names that could be likened to the names of WWE wrestlers. Some porn
stars even had their own finishing maneuvers, or so I’m told. The plot lines
were terrible and the acting even worse. People made money off the sex, but
still somehow used to find a way of bringing some kind of creativity into it.
The porn movie title puns have made their mark on pop culture to the point
where people still try to come up with creative names for pornos even though it
hasn’t really been done in the actual porn industry since the 90’s.
Let’s celebrate creativity in all its forms. See below for
the top 5 funniest porn titles I could find:
I thought I'd take a shot at creating porn pun titles for some films that were released in the past 3 years. Here goes:
BOYHOOD - BOY WOOD
BIG HERO 6 - BIG HERO SEX
HAIL, CAESAR! - NAIL, CAESAR!
JASON BOURNE - JASON'S PORN
WARCRAFT - WHORE CRAFT
BEN-HUR - BEND HER
THE PURGE: ELECTION YEAR - THE URGE: ERECTION YEAR
Let me know in the comments if you thought of a few more funny titles or if there were any that you came across.
(get it? "came" across! hahaha. Fuck you, that was funny.)
That is all.
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